I do not want to tell anyone what to do as I am a new hedgie owner myself, but at the same time I researched for months before I got my hedgie so I can regurgitate a lot of information that I have read here that was provided by some of the best hedgie owners and breeders around.
I feel that breeding animals such as hedgies should always be a planned experience as it is very well known to the hedgehog community that it is unsafe to house male and female hedgies together (although the housing of females together is a debated topic) because accidents do happen. When I was first researching hedgies I wanted two but wanted to house them together and after researching it was clear that such a practice is a strict no-no (so now I only have one and love him to bits). I understand that you do not know why your friend choose to breed them now but from what I have read here the members of HHC take the well being of hedgies, especially babies, extremely seriously which would indicate why you feel that the responses which you have received have a cold tone to them.
IF your firend is a breeder he should know when to expect the babies and plan as to how long he needs to provide stress-free care for them as well as how to care for them i.e. removing the mothers wheel while she is pregnant until the babies are no longer under her care. Nancy's comment was not rude, she was just expressing her feelings that she feels bad for a mother hedgie who's pregnancy was not as well thought out as it should be and unfortunately she has to be moved around, which causes stress, during her pregnancy and after-birth. It sounds like your friend should think well in advance when coupling males and female together to breed them. I am not saying he should halt his whole life to take care of them but rather plan for pregnancy around his life i.e. not breeding in the summer when so many people often take vacations in the summer for weeks on end and there is a possibility that he might not be with them for the entire pregnancy and birthing process. Perhaps, as a former breeder, you can tell him about these types of things when he returns and he will take your information seriously.
I am sure now that you have the babies and the mother you will do your best to keep them safe and healthy by first removing the wheel and then leaving the mother and babies alone for the most part in a quiet environment and hopefully keep them until they are done weaning for their own well being.
Good luck.