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Topic Review (Newest First)
03-01-2014 07:57 PM
Fifiiinka Thank you Abby and Phoenix1964. Thank you so much <3
02-16-2014 07:35 PM
phoenix1964 It takes a truly strong person to let something they love go, and not keep them around for selfish reasons. You are stronger than you give yourself credit for.
God bless you and yours
02-16-2014 02:57 PM
abbys I'm glad you're feeling a bit better! It's amazing how animals can touch our lives so much and have such a huge impact on us, but we wouldn't be the same without them.

Be at peace, Pipka, and watch over your mommy and daddy!
02-16-2014 03:06 AM
Fifiiinka Pipka is now at better place. I held her the whole time, kept kissing and comforting her. She passed away quickly. I could not stop kissing her, it was very emotional for both me and my fiance. It was the first time somebody was there for me and was strong for me, as I dealt with this all by myself.

Surprisingly, that terrible feeling of fear went away. I was freaking out every day she might be in pain. Kept waking up to check on her at least 6 times per night. It felt great to have someone here, that cries with me and who feels close to how I feel. I feel empty and I cry at least twice per hour. I know it will get better and one fact that comforts me the most is that I will have her ashes soon. She will be with me forever.

I would like to thank all of you, who did my poll, answer my looong and many times annoying questions, who found time to reach out to me, to those who comforted me. I needed this so badly, needed someone to tell me - it's going to be fine. I thanked you so much in my mind. Each time I've read your reply, I thanked you out loud. This place became my energy charger, you girls kept me going, fighting, asking, demanding. I will be forever thankful.

This is my favourite song (
) and we felt asleep with Pipka together while listening to it yesterday. It's about a loss of pet, dog in this case. It makes me bawl my eyes out, but it helps at the same time. My little one is gone, but when I look around, I see her everywhere. Running in her wheel, peeing on my freshly washed blanket cover

I have her blue blanket and will keep it underneath of my pillow. She was very special and my fiance and I are not sure why we were so close to her, we both had another pets before, but this little critter was so special. We cried together today in the vet's office and I never saw him cry before. We wanted to keep her in our arms forever and we would, but the vet opened the door and took her away.

Thank you again everyone, without you I would not make it. Thank you so so so much. You helped me tremendously and this blog is my new favorite website. It helps to save lives. Not only those of the hedgies, but their owners's too.


02-15-2014 05:51 PM
Fifiiinka I am wearing two clay hearts I made yesterday. In one there is her paw imprint and in the other her quill. One more hour to go. Then she will be happy again.
02-15-2014 04:42 AM
Fifiiinka Yes, I do not want to have pets any more. Yes, I did go to the vet office yesterday to get her surgery. He told me there is not even slightest chance for her to survive. Today, I called another vet clinic in Burnaby, described the situation, their vet surgeon there told me it might be too late now as her tumour started bleeding. I was keeping her alive only to get that second opinion. I also rushed to the vet yesterday to grab her painkillers as I do not want her to be in pain at all.

Tomorrow at 3 pm we are going to put her to sleep. She is pain free, but this is super crappy life she lives right now. I hope this makes a bit more sense. I will be ok, it just takes time. She means a lot to me, she is not just a pet, she is my friend. She helped me tremendously and I hurt a lot now, but at the same time I am not out to lunch and I will get better. It feels lonely as it's hard to cope with this alone. I have truly no one to talk to and my friends do not understand. For them pets are pets and pets come and go. For me, it's totally different. I hope I make sense now. Thank you again for your support. For those who worry about my hedgie, she is pain free. I monitor her and based on her weight distribute painkillers each 5 hours based on what my vet recommended. Tomorrow she will earn her wings
02-15-2014 12:41 AM
nikki I'm sorry but if you are having this much trouble dealing with this then having pets may not be a good thing for you. Pets have shorter life spans than we do so with any pet you have to deal with losing them at some point. If you are unable to continue with your life after then its not healthy to have pets.
02-14-2014 11:26 PM
Originally Posted by Fifiiinka View Post
I try but I haven't left my room in 2 days.
I'm confused. I thought you had her to the vet yesterday?
02-14-2014 11:16 PM
Annie&Tibbers Resuming normal activities and routines can be a way of managing grief, but if you find that you are truly unable to continue your studies, look into school policy on a Leave of Absence. I don't know where you're going to graduate school in Vancouver, but most of the universities have a version of Leave of Absence, putting your studies on hold for any reason (which you do not need to disclose) and resuming them later. You don't get your scholarship or research money during that time, but you also don't have that time count against your total permitted time to complete courses.
02-14-2014 08:28 PM
Fifiiinka I just called the vet office again and asked about getting her ashes back. It's possible. I am going to do it. It makes me feel less desperate and depressed. I am not sure how I will cope tomorrow, I have no idea. Good thing is my fiance is coming to Vancouver so I won't be as much alone, but tomorrow is going to be one of the worst days in my life. I am trying to prepare myself, but it's impossible. I am very glad though that I can keep her ashes and we can be together forever. I love her so much. I am not sure how to get back to life. I try but I haven't left my room in 2 days. I am not sure how I will finish school. But I truly do not care. I just want tomorrow to be over finally.
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