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Old 08-30-2013, 01:28 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Dearest little Dosa,

Just because you are in my lap, under the table where I can't see you... Doesn't mean I can't smell it when you poop.

Love,
Your Litterbox Lap
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Old 09-07-2013, 12:19 AM   #12 (permalink)
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My fastidious friend,

I know going in the wheel is a totally normal hedgehog characteristic.
I know preferentially pooping in a litter box is a thing some hedgehogs do, and others don't.
I know that occasionally your brethren can be extraordinarily tidy in their adventures, although it is fairly rare.

But really, you need one wheel for waste, and another for running, so you don't get your feet messy? I understand that poop-boots aren't the most stylish accessory, but that does seem a wee bit picky.

Love,
Your indulgent human
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Old 09-16-2013, 02:18 AM   #13 (permalink)
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To my fleecy ghost,

Just because you hide under your blankie doesn't mean I can't see you as you scoot around the room.

Ever observant,
Your spying human
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Old 09-16-2013, 03:38 AM   #14 (permalink)
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Dear my not-so-skinny baby,

Hiding under your fleece liner does not mean I cannot see you. You are not the skinniest hedgie in the world- but I love you anyway. Now stop flipping your food bowls over after you eat every time.

Love, Daddy #1 and Daddy #2
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Old 09-16-2013, 06:21 AM   #15 (permalink)
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Dear poop machine,

I know you don't understand human emotions, but a snuggle would have been sufficient. I truly didn't need your stinky present on my shoulder. Thanks for the thought though.

Love,
Your personal jungle gym
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Old 09-16-2013, 09:48 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Dear Francisco,

I know that daddy smells really interesting but you need to stop "tasting" him. He does not find it amusing. You're chompers are sharper than they look.

Sincerely,

The normal smelling one.
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Old 09-21-2013, 01:44 AM   #17 (permalink)
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My stylish hoglet,

I, too, love high heels. I just don't normally dive into them nose-first.

To each their own,
A foot-first human
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Old 09-21-2013, 08:21 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Dear Hedgie baby number 1,

I baught you a hut so you could have a space of your own, yet you still sleep under the fleece beside the hut....

I love you Reagrdless,
Your confused Momma

Dear Hedgie baby # 2

I just want to give you love, why must you reject it? Also why must you poop on all my friends?

You are a special fella,
Love your Momma
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Old 09-27-2013, 02:58 AM   #19 (permalink)
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My freshly-scrubbed hedgehog,

If you poop and immediately sit in it, squishing it into your quills, you're going to go right back into the bath, even if you're still wet from the last one.

Unsympathetically,
Your strict human
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Old 09-28-2013, 02:07 AM   #20 (permalink)
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Dear my little cuddle-dork, (Meeko)

When you crawl up my shoulder and lick the back of my neck, it may be oh-so cute but I do have to take you down from there because it tickles and I don't want you to fall. I promise I'm not just being a big meanie-pants.

Sincerely,
Your worrywart mommy


Dear little grumpy pants, (Truffles)

Just because I take out your wheel does not mean it is gone forever. I promise I am just cleaning it because you have absolutely destroyed it with your poops and I WILL put it back. Also, you can bite and huff and puff all you want, but I know you are realizing how much I love you after the rough life of mean owners you have had. When I hold you in a little ball in the palm of my hand after I have managed to clip a few nails, you look at me and I can see the love in your little beady eyes.

Sincerely,
Your lovestruck and cleaning mommy
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